Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Date Rape Lipgloss and Buttersticks

Current mood:gangster...duh
Married on MySpace, Season 2??? What? How did I miss Season 1 of this and where do I sign up for my myspace husband? This is ridiculous, my invitation must have gotten lost in the mail. So tis the week of awesome inventions so I thought I’d share my top 5:


#1 The butter stick…really? How dope is this? I’d carry this shit in my purse and put butter on everything and everyone. My nickname would be Buttersnack or Butters for short.


#2 The boyfriend pillow cause the creepiness of having a fake scary arm draped over you is outweighed by the comfort of knowing bobby pillow cares and he will spoon the shit out of you when your loser BF bounces so no more settling ladies!

#3 Bacon grease candles. ohhh I can almost hear the fat people around the world rejoicing. It’s supposed to be for cooking purposes or for when you just need that hint of bacon grease but why do I not feel comfortable in thinking that its being used for its real purpose? This just has so much potential to go wrong.

#4 Date Rape Detecting Lipgloss. How boring is this? I like my daterape to be a surprise. This will come in handy especially since I always test my shots with my lips before I down them. How long do floories take to kick in anyways??

#5 The Step N Wrap. I actually have a witness who can confirm that I almost choked on my excitement when I saw this. I thought I was being punked but no it is real and I want it. I want everyone who comes into my house to Step…..and WRAP!
(Due to janky advertising I do not have a picture)

BTW, omg wtf….lol…happened in HB last night? I went to get Starbucks this morning and felt like I slept thru Katrina.

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